The primetime anchor of the channel is insistent and persistent—suggesting like a psychiatrist to the subconscious that there cannot be a more compelling issue. For the last two nights, his is a solo vociferous voice in the ear canal, demanding that everything else be dropped and everybody in Uttar Pradesh doggedly pursuing the “cash in the tunnel” election issue.

“I am going to open the phone lines, I’m going to open the phone lines,” he tells the line-up of guests in their little square boxes, the warning that he is serious and not about to relent.

The story is, the ruling Bhartatiya Janata Party—and the party’s ‘Double-engine ki Sarkar’ in Uttar Pradesh —is in a fix. More than it wants an electoral plank, it does not want a couple of other planks—one, the farmers protests—Lakhimpur-Kheri-Teni issue; two, the ‘Hindu Vs. Hindutva’ differentiation row.

The farmers’ protests were of Prime Narendra Modi’s making and Modi realizing rather late that he had very less time to walk back from the brink. The damage was done. Lakhimpur-Kheri happened and ‘Mishra-Teni’ added to the BJP’s woes. Now, it’s an issue simmering and refusing to go away, come what may.

The second—the ‘Hindu Versus Hindutva’ row—cleverly injected into the political discourse and electoral rhetoric by the politically-savvy 100-plus-year-old Congress—has neutered the BJP’s aging Hindu-Muslim polarization plank. With an alternate definition for ‘Hindu’—inclusive and liberal—the BJP’s ‘Hindutva’ is with its back to the wall, like a truant boy left to explain his conduct.

The farmers’ protests and ‘Hindu-Hindutva’ were potent issues against the BJP, which found that it was losing the perception battle just when it counted most. The two issues continue to pull the BJP out of contention—and threaten to drag it out of the competition altogether.

The ‘Dharam Sansad’ in Haridwar—and a second one at Raipur—haven’t helped. Now, there is even reason to justify the ‘Hindu terror’ charge and the ‘saffron terror’ tag. Things were not going according to plan and script. There is even talk that the “Dharam Sansads” were a plant to thwart the BJP, and that the Congress was behind the carnivorous plant.

It is at such a time that the Piyush Jain cash tunnel bore its way into the narrative—succour for the Hindutva. “Forget Hindu, Hindutva; forget farmers’ protests, forget Lakhimpur-Kheri, all these pale in comparison—it’s the poor people’s money, those behind this should be banned from taking part in elections, forever,” the words shouted at the top of the voice.

If there was Alibaba, he would have shouted “Open Seasame”, but there is no Alibaba. The “Challis Chor”, if they are indeed there, are unknown—only the tunnels of cash and gold and “three names of politicians”! But who? Nobody in Government is talking and BJP spokespersons are like mummies.

The mystery helps—as does the ‘Alibaba and 40 Chor’ narrative help the BJP. It can now hunt with the hounds. There are no hares. The primetime anchor, gunning for the Samajwadi Party, cannot wait for the tunnels of cash and gold issue to dig in, and take hold.

Meanwhile, the tower-stacks of cash stand like sentinels. If clueless media are to be believed, the “40 thieves” are faceless politicians, three of whose identities are being tightly guarded because they would spill the beans.

Of course, there is no Alibaba. That is a fairytale. But there is the Directorate General of GST Intelligence (DGGI) and the biggest seizure in over a lifetime—Rs 195 crore in cash, 23 kilograms of gold and sandalwood oil worth Rs 6 crore. Whose man is Uttar Pradesh perfumer Piyush Jain? Is he an independent operator, a BJP lackey, or an SP lashkar? There are in history many collectors of perfume, but this one’s been elected to save somebody’s goose.

Will the outlier media’s anchor-in-chief succeed in turning tunnels of cash and gold into an election issue for BJP’s sake? The answer to that is, his ‘Open Sesame’ is out there in the open. Finally, at the end of the day, when everything fails Narendra Modi and Yogi Adityanath may only have ‘Alibaba and his 40 thieves’ to thank! (IPA Service)