But Trump is an anty cat and, like the saying goes, a cat has nine lives. Alternatively, the 45th President can be described as a 'Cool American Trump'. With this assassin caught in time, there are six more to come and Election Day November 5 isn't that far, less than a month away. So 'Bring It On', you got less than a month to send 'Orange Head' to the 'Happy Hunting Grounds' of the no-nonsense Apaches.

So far three assassination attempts and all three duds except the first took the life of a Trump supporter who took the bullet that could have been the one which grazed Trump's ear. Trump wore a bandage on the ear for several days and fans of Trump took to wearing the ear bandage in solidarity.

The wannabe assassin, just out of his teens, was killed and Trump was seen pumping a fist in the air, shouting "Fight, Fight, Fight.” There was still lots of fight left in Trump. It was the Secret Service which had to fight accusations of no fight left in it.

The Secret Service fumbled and the outfit head paid with her job. This was the state of Trump in the aftermath of the first assassination attempt when the second assassination attempt tested the Secret Service all over again. At Mar-a-Lago in Florida, where Trump had set up headquarters after leaving ‘Trump Tower’ in New York.

Trump is a sucker for real-estate. There is a Trump hotel in Pennsylvania, too, not far from the White House, where Trump lived and worked for four years. A second assassin tried his bullet on Trump, but itchy-fingered Secret Service agents came in the way. A SS agent spotted the business end of a rifle poking out of a clump of foliage and his gun went rat-a-tat like a beating heart.

Luckily, Trump was tone deaf and didn't hear the rat-a-tat. Thus ended the second attempt on Trump's life. There were seven more lives left, when Vem Miller was caught with two guns and a high-end high-powered magazine a couple of miles from Trump’s California rally.

Makes one think, why is Trump being spared by 'Yama', the Grim Reaper, and for what? Maybe, there's no prime real-estate left in Hell to house Trump! The second assassin wasn't half as good as the first one, whose parents are being tried for his botched attempt. Assassins are not for hire; the 'for hire' are 'hit-men' and ‘contract killers.’

James Hadley Chase made contract killers notorious with his crime novels. The three who shot and killed Baba Siddiqui in Mumbai on Dussehra wouldn’t have been given a role in any of the Chase crime novels. Baba Siddiqui’s hired killers look like ragged editions of the glassy-eyed Chase hit-men.

Trump's wannabe assassins were apprentices. Trump would have sacked them with the cryptic “You’re fired!” Trump’s first wannabe assassin got shot through the head. The second got caught red-handed. The third drove straight into a ‘Catch me if you can” trap!

The third wannabe Trump assassin had come with a shotgun and a handgun. Also passports in different names. The good news is Melania Trump doesn't have to update her memoir. Trump is still within earshot of Melania and Barron Trump. The third potential assassin was arrested and released on bail. He claimed only love for Donald Trump and belongs to a far right group of naysayers.

The 49-year-old was in a black SUV and sported an unkempt look. The US Secret Service later said Trump wasn't in any sort of danger. Question arises, who wants Trump's scalp? Trump is not all that bad a person, is he? But the level of hatred he generates is mystifying. Hillary Clinton and Barack Obama will pay to watch Trump squirm.

The Secret Service has no clue why Trump’s life is important to people who want to snuff it out? From Abraham Lincoln to Martin Luther King to John and Robert Kennedy, assassins have had it very easy in the United States, they just walk up to the target and shoot. Is it Hollywood and movies like the ‘Godfather’ and ‘Goodfellas’, ‘Pulp fiction’ and the ‘Good, Bad & Ugly’?

The Secret Service isn’t looking for clues. The three wannabe Trump assassins were lone wolves – freelancers, unemployed but not lacking in dollars to buy guns and ammo. Donald Trump, 45th President of the United States and looking to be 47th, is a lucky bloke, with more lives than a K9!

God only knows why he is being saved, and for what? God, Devil, or Grim Reaper, all three want Trump gone for good. In American angrezi, Donald Trump's life is not worth a busted nickel. For now, though, Donald Trump has one more bedtime story to tell his grandchildren – of assassins and Trump’s ear. The grandchildren will be all ears! (IPA Service)